Untying nuptial knot: Divorce rate on rise

By Nilima Adhikari

Kathmandu, Mar. 2: Popular singer Eleena Chauhan’s divorce recently made news headlines. She brought her married life to an abrupt end within a year after differences with her husband Bishnu Sapkota crossed the limits. The frequent divorce cases of celebrities get the media limelight in Nepal and elsewhere. However, these days divorce cases are high not only among celebrities but also among the common men and women.There are several reports to support this proposition.  

The Annual Report of the Supreme Court for the fiscal year 2022/23 showed that 40,183 divorce cases were filed in the country within a year. Of them, 65 cases were registered in the Supreme Court, 1,129 cases in High Courts and 38,989 cases in District Courts across the country. Likewise, in the fiscal year 2023/24, a total of 4,464 divorce cases were registered in Kathmandu District Court. Of them, final verdict was given on 3,948 cases. 

Likewise, in the first seven and a half months of the current fiscal year, 2,719 couples filed for divorce and of them 903 cases were finalised, according to Hemanta Bhattrai, Section Officer at District Court, Kathmandu. He also said that divorce cases are the third most frequently filed cases in the court after banking offenses and cheque bounce cases.

According to the Information Officer at District Court, Bhaktapur, a total of 351 couples filed for divorce in the fiscal year 2023/24 and of them verdict was given on 349 cases. Likewise, property-related cases of 40 couples seeking divorce were decided. The Information Officer of Lalitpur District Court, Ram Sajiban Mahato, said in the last fiscal year, 3,027 divorce cases were filed.  

As per the Information Officer of the Morang District Court, in the last fiscal 1,986 divorce cases were filed in the district, of which 1,581 cases have been settled. These statistics show that divorce cases have significantly increased over the years in Nepal, with majority of divorce cases recorded in urban centers. 

The National Civil (Code) Act, 2017 (2074) has made provisions allowing men like women to file for divorce under the following circumstances: a) A husband can file for divorce without the consent of the wife if she has been living separately for three or more consecutive years, without the consent of the husband. B) If the wife deprives the husband of maintenance costs or expels him from the house. C) If the wife commits an act or conspiracy likely to cause grievous hurt or other severe physical or mental pain to the husband. (d) If a wife is proven to have made sexual relations with another person, said advocate Mahendra Kumar Bomjom.

After the implementation of the new Civil Code, the number of men seeking legal remedies for divorce has also increased. Divorce has been made easier for men as well, leading to a significant rise in divorce cases in the courts, said Bomjon. 

Nisha Rawal (name changed), 38, from Bardiya district, had an arranged marriage in 2012. She worked as an ANM at the local health post in her hometown, whereas her husband was a lawyer. Their relationship turned sour due to infertility, leading to emotional and psychological abuse from her husband and in-laws.  Despite her efforts to save the marriage, the situation worsened, and so did the abuse. In the selection process conducted by the Department of Foreign Employment of the Ministry of Labour, Employment and Social Security, she was selected to work as a caretaker in Israel.

Currently, she works as a caregiver in Israel and earns nearly Rs. 200,000 per month, achieving financial independence. “Looking back, I feel divorce was not the end of life but a path to freedom and empowerment,” she said. “Embracing the newfound independence, strength and peace, I regret not leaving earlier.” 

In the past, a deeply patriarchal society, lack of financial dependence, societal pressure and the stigma attached to divorce compelled women to suffer in unhappy marriages. A few decades back, divorce in Nepal was less common and was something frowned upon by the society. However, today, with women becoming more independent, educated, and increasingly aware of their rights, a growing number of females are less tolerant of abuse, which often leads to divorce, said Sabita Pokhrel, Chairperson of the Women’s Rehabilitation Centre (WOREC) Nepal, a non-governmental organisation based in Nepal, dedicated to safeguarding and advancing human rights of women and girls. 

She said that women, especially those economically independent, have stopped tolerating violence stemming from the stigma attached to divorce and added that society has started becoming more tolerant of divorcee women.

She, however, noted the situation in Madhes Province is not similar to the situation of other regions. In Madhes Province, reconciliation is higher, compared to divorce because the socio-cultural practices, norms and values are more rigid compared to the other regions of the country. 

With better education and employment opportunities, women are now more aware of their rights and less likely to tolerate abusive or unhappy marriages, leading to increased number of divorces.

Foreign employment has become one of the main causes of divorce in Nepal. Many Nepali workers, men in particular, go abroad to work as migrant workers to support their family, but their prolonged absence leads to extramarital affairs and trust issues. In some cases, women left behind face economic hardships, social pressure and loneliness, prompting them to seek legal separation for a more stable life. At the same time, we have many instances in which the money sent by the husband being misused by the wife having an extramarital relationship which leads to separation and family disintegration. 

As per a news report, in the past five years, a total of 7,307 divorce cases have been filed in the district courts of 10 districts in Karnali Province. Out of these, 5,958 cases have been settled so far. Among them, 5,043 cases –85 percent-- were filed by women, while 1,630 cases were filed by men.

As per studies, early marriage is high in Karnali Province, which leads to a lack of emotional maturity and financial independence needed to sustain a long-term relationship resulting in the rise of the divorce rate. As awareness about individual rights and gender equality grows, young women choose divorce to escape unhappy relations and explore their life and potential that they failed to do due to early marriage.

Nirmal Gautam, Assistant Lecturer of Sociology in Mahendra Multiple Campus, Dang, said, “The Constitution of Nepal 2015 recognised women's rights as human rights and ensured the practice of inclusive democracy at all levels of the state. This significantly impacted women’s rights within the family, guaranteeing them equal rights over the ancestral property.”

“Furthermore, reproductive rights, inheritance rights and lineage rights were not just limited to be part of a husband's rights but were explicitly recognised as women's special rights. These progressive provisions strengthened gender equality and empowered women both in the legal and social sphere, which led to women being less tolerant to violence and abuse.”

He also said that factors such as delayed marriage due to financial stability, foreign employment, and misuse of remittance, fascination with foreign lifestyles, and the influence of materialistic desires too have played a role in increasing relationship breakdowns.

Over the years divorce among people above 50 years and above, often termed as grey divorce, has become more frequent, which once was almost rare. After spending decades together, couples choose to separate. Along with other reasons, ‘empty nest syndrome’ has been considered a major reason for divorce in recent years. Couples who choose to stay together with a shared purpose of raising their children, after the offspring grow up and settle, lack a shared goal, which makes them feel disconnected, prompting them to separate.