Pick Your Role Model

Nishtha Shrestha

We learn from role models throughout our lives. The famous experiment by Albert Bandura on aggression showed how our behaviours are influenced by the type and actions of role models. Even though we may not be aware of the scientific evidence behind the importance of role models, it has been promoted in our society through stories and quotes. This historical evidence is proof of role models being an integral part of our development. 

For the children, the first role model is the caregivers. While the genetic code does influence behaviour, the family environment also determines the personality of the child. Children are fast learners and hence any type of information is internalised quickly. This helps to develop relationships in the family, but lack of attention can cause harmful behaviours to be learnt and followed. An example of how caregivers can be effective role models is during disasters. Research supports the claim that caregivers are the first responders in the case of children. The emotional reaction of the caregivers to a calamity such as an earthquake is learnt by the child. Thus, to ensure children are safe, caregivers must teach safety skills and remain calm to help regulate the child. This is an important lesson for a disaster-prone country like Nepal. 

It is said, "A man is known by the company he keeps." Friends are the second set of role models who shape our perspective of the world. It is a natural part of socialisation where children reach the stage at which they pay more attention to friends than their parents. While we cannot force friendships, we can attempt to surround ourselves with friends who motivate us to grow and make positive decisions. The role of friends is spoken of but considered minimal in the life of a person. But there are many examples of friendships leading to success stories all around us. Besides career gains, a friend as a role model can help us to navigate the stressors in life and provide the comfort which may be lacking in the home environment.

 Humans need companions to thrive. Many societies promote marriage as the only way to have a partner. If the negative meanings and pressures are ignored, the social institution offers a chance to learn and grow with a role model. A partner offers an opportunity to explore one's strengths and weaknesses. Rather than focusing on materialistic and aesthetic aspects, the choice should be dependent on whether the partnership helps both parties to become a better version of themselves. The choice to procreate is a personal decision. If one does decide to have a child, being a good role model for one's child is also a task of this partnership. Hence, choosing a life partner equates to finding a role model with whom lessons such as conflict management, finance and intimacy can be both learnt and shared. 

 In isolation, we cannot estimate our capabilities. We compare to change and find better options. Thus, we have to pick a good comparative measure to achieve our goals. Putting effort to pick effective role models not only benefits personal lives, but also that of a country. A good leader can model and implement productive actions in the country. When given the opportunity, people must take the time to choose the role model they want to follow and set an example for the next generation.